This is a time where i really want to write, but i don't especially have anything to write about. which is a statement that very well precedes a rambling. or a rant. or just a little bit of one-sided talking from someone on the other side of the ocean.
I've been having more and more visions lately. Which makes me happy that I'm in touch with other worlds, but then there's a little part of me that thinks maybe I'm going to be skitzophrenic later on in life. I guess time will tell on that one. When i say visions, i mean a couple of things. First, there's the flashes of insight into people's lives that i have when i am calm and allow my mind to clear. thinking about nothing is like tuning into this giant world radio, picking up signals from non-linear time. and when i bring up these things that i seem to know about people, to that specific person, it always turns out to be true. i guess it's like having really strong intuition.
The second kind of vision relates to, usually, the apocalypse. Brief moments when I turn around and instead of seeing what is really there, I see piles of ruins and burning debris in my mind's eye. This happened strongly only one time, when I was younger. Usually when I hallucinate it's about seeing bugs and spiders everywhere. which, in Japan, makes my skin crawl because sometimes it's not a vision at all!
The third kind of vision is one that exists in my visual field. Last night I was lying on my couch and I saw a flash of brilliant light out of the corner of my eye. In my room with the curtains closed. it was a bright white beam, close to the side of my head. it happened twice last night when i was deeply relaxed, engrossed in a book. I was totally weirded out by that, and still haven't made heads or tails of it. And i think it's unfair for me to believe I will ever understand myself. how much % of our brains do we use?! there's so many different planes we don't know about, or can't wrap the portion of our brains that we do use, around. So I'll just continue on living my life and looking for signs from the universe that I'm following the right path. And believe that the things I know, which I couldn't possibly have known, but things that just come to me when i'm in a calm state, are all tied into spirituality, and not signs that I'm going crazy.
or is sanity a delusion in itself? oh, so many questions!
tomorrow is my first day as the Head of Teacher Development for East Japan. oooh, it's going to be a fun one!
I've been having more and more visions lately. Which makes me happy that I'm in touch with other worlds, but then there's a little part of me that thinks maybe I'm going to be skitzophrenic later on in life. I guess time will tell on that one. When i say visions, i mean a couple of things. First, there's the flashes of insight into people's lives that i have when i am calm and allow my mind to clear. thinking about nothing is like tuning into this giant world radio, picking up signals from non-linear time. and when i bring up these things that i seem to know about people, to that specific person, it always turns out to be true. i guess it's like having really strong intuition.
The second kind of vision relates to, usually, the apocalypse. Brief moments when I turn around and instead of seeing what is really there, I see piles of ruins and burning debris in my mind's eye. This happened strongly only one time, when I was younger. Usually when I hallucinate it's about seeing bugs and spiders everywhere. which, in Japan, makes my skin crawl because sometimes it's not a vision at all!
The third kind of vision is one that exists in my visual field. Last night I was lying on my couch and I saw a flash of brilliant light out of the corner of my eye. In my room with the curtains closed. it was a bright white beam, close to the side of my head. it happened twice last night when i was deeply relaxed, engrossed in a book. I was totally weirded out by that, and still haven't made heads or tails of it. And i think it's unfair for me to believe I will ever understand myself. how much % of our brains do we use?! there's so many different planes we don't know about, or can't wrap the portion of our brains that we do use, around. So I'll just continue on living my life and looking for signs from the universe that I'm following the right path. And believe that the things I know, which I couldn't possibly have known, but things that just come to me when i'm in a calm state, are all tied into spirituality, and not signs that I'm going crazy.
or is sanity a delusion in itself? oh, so many questions!
tomorrow is my first day as the Head of Teacher Development for East Japan. oooh, it's going to be a fun one!
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